A Face Only A Goat-Farmer Could Love

1. See? Goats are disturbing.

2. Yesterday, I hit a moment of blogger's block and asked for suggestions on Twitter.

3. The first topic suggestion was zombies.

4. I realized suddenly that this blog has a regrettable lack of information on zombies, a situation I plan to rectify tomorrow.

5. Stay tuned.

6. Today, I get to go pee in a cup to prove to my company that I was not flying high on crack when I bashed my brains in on the shelf in the walk-in cooler.

7. Since I went to my own dr and didn't submit a worker's comp claim, I think this is ridiculous.

8. Still, they have the power to tell me I can't work a shift until I prove I've got nothing more sinister than Tylenol and Hot Tamales (which are of the devil) in my blood.

9. LOST is having a fantastic season.

10. This morning the Today show announced that romance novels appear to be recession-proof. Sales have gone up 30% since the whole panic about the economy started.

11. Yay for job security!

12. Speaking of novels, here's a friendly fyi: Many people who know me personally have asked me recently to email them a copy of my novel so they can read it.

13. I will NOT do it.

14. It's not because I don't love you, like you, or tolerate you reasonably well.

15. It's not because I'm not thrilled that you're so excited about SF you don't want to wait to read it in paperback form.

16. It's certainly not because I'm upset that you've sworn you'll still buy two copies when it hits the shelves.

17. It's because I lose control over who has the manuscript when I send it out and publisher's don't take kindly to buying work that is already crawling slowly across the Internet for free.

18. So, I may love you, like you, or tolerate you reasonably well, but if you don't already have a copy (i.e. Hubby and critique partners), you'll have to wait to buy your own.

19. I asked for topics on Twitter, but those of you who comment here are always a wealth of interesting ideas, so ...

20. Reader Question: What topic/s should I blog about next time I hit a blogger's block?

But...Where's The Sparkle?

A few weeks ago, I met a writer friend at my local bookstore for coffee and conversation. Naturally, we also browsed the shelves and selected a few more books for our huge TBR piles. As we approached the cashier, our shiny new books clutched in our hands, we saw the most incredible thing.

Eddie and Bells action figures. Huge action figures. Bigger than Barbies. I guess you know you've arrived when a bookstore is selling action figures of your main characters. I was quite disappointed with them, though. Poor Eddie had not a single sparkle.

Romance Cooties!

Friend and fellow author Kerry Allen has a new site up and running called Romance Cooties. Ostensibly, the premise is a glimpse behind the scenes of a romance novel using the setting of an academy for heroines and four very interesting characters.

In reality, it's some of the most entertaining YA writing I've ever read. If you like YA or you want to learn how to establish VOICE in your writing, head over and check it out. She's brilliant.

Is It Monday Already?

1. The boys are home for Spring Break this week which means I don't have to set my alarm so early.

2. It also means finding quiet time to write is much more difficult to do.

3. Jeaniene Frost has agreed to be interviewed on this blog in May. Yay!!

4. Any questions you'd like to ask her?

5. Carly, one of our kittens, is very sick.

6. The vet says it's fatal. I researched her illness online and only found one case where a cat was cured.

7. I'm forcing food and an auto-immune builder (something I've used successfully myself) down her throat every two hours and praying for a miracle.

8. I don't think one is coming and having to face that grief again so soon is really rough.

9. Started my online query workshop today (it's confined to some specific writer loops or I'd issue a blanket invitation to my blog readers).

10. My house looks like I have three boys home for Spring Break.

11. I'm going to remedy that situation today and they're going to help.

12. I'm sure they'll be thrilled to hear that.

13. The effects of my concussion are nearly non-existent at this point and I'm glad.

14. One of my friends offered to get me a customized helmet and while I could totally rock the helmet look (yeah, right), I turned her down.

15. Two days ago, I was driving home from the store in my hubby's car, grabbed the sun visor to move it to the side--forgetting that the little plastic clip that anchors it in place broke off a while ago--and yanked.

16. Naturally, with nothing anchoring it in place, the sun visor flew toward me and smacked me in the forehead.

17. It didn't hurt.

18. But I did reconsider the whole helmet thing.

19. Reader Question: What questions would you like asked of Jeaniene Frost when I interview her? These can be specific to her as an author or questions for an author in general. I don't promise to use your question, but I'd love to get some ideas. :)

Love Them Or Hate Them

You-the-writer must have empathy for your characters. You have to like them — or hate them. I’m not saying believe they’re real — that road leads to the Palace of Psychosis, and nobody will visit you there except to mock — but you have to let them into your heart as well as your head. It’s that emotional connection that allows you to care about them, not as the means to deliver a message, or to flip a twist, but as actual individuals going through hell. Once you care about them, you can make other people care about them, too.

If you don’t? if you’re emotionally removed from your characters, or see them merely as markers to be moved along the story, in order to achieve a final goal? The most brilliant prose in the world won’t do you for d---.

(Laura Anne Gilman)

Authentic characters are an intrinsic element to excellent writing. I will read just about anything in any genre if I am captivated by the characters. I need to love the hero and heroine. I must empathize with their struggles, be frustrated with their faults, and sit on pins and needles as their choices spiral the entire plot out of control. I need to despise and fear the villain. I need to reach out with shaky hands to peel away the outer layer and view the ruins beneath what makes him tick. I need to sink beneath the skin of each character until their Voice is as recognizable as my own, their reactions are second-nature, their joys make me pump my fist in victory, and their tragedies cut into me as if they were my own.

When a writer can usher me into each character's inner sanctum, I don't care about genre, plot, or setting. I'm hers.

How do we as writers seduce our readers with our characters? I've talked about authentic motivation, a deep understanding of what formed our characters, and never pushing them in a certain direction simply because our synopsis tells us we should.

The above quote sums up another aspect of writing compelling characters in one little line--You have to like them — or hate them.

If your characters don't inspire emotion in you, how can they possibly inspire emotion in others?

I'm sure each writer approaches learning her characters in different ways. My approach is simple, though any non-writers reading this will probably think I'm in need of some Prozac and a nice padded room. =) My characters come to life in my head. Usually, the germ of an idea for a book or series arrives first and I start asking myself who the main characters are. I get details in fits and starts. One day I'll be driving and I'll realize the heroine has long red hair and a barbed wire tattoo around her neck.

But why the tattoo? I ask myself.

A few days later, the answer comes and with it, the knowledge that her past is a sticky mess and she's addicted to pecan pancakes swimming in maple syrup.

Are those two items related? Not really. They're details. And over the course of months (Yes, months!), the picture forms. I get to know her past. Her mission. Her personality. Her appearance. Her home. Her dreams. Her faults. The cracks running through her foundation that make her who she is. By the time I sit down to write her book, I know which album on my iTunes best fits her story, what she's wearing in the first scene, and how she's likely to react to the crap I'm about to throw her way.

I'm finishing another small bout of revisions to SF's ending, I'm plotting (kind of...as much plotting as this Pantser can do) TF, and the glimmers of the final book in the series (BF--which does NOT stand for best friend or boy friend or any other ridiculous texting shorthand) are already clamoring for attention.

BUT, the heroine for the series I want to write after Fate is finished is loudly claiming her corner of my mind. And so is her hero. By the time I get to her, I'll know her as well as I know myself. I like her. I'm afraid for her. I want her to succeed. I know the obstacles in her way are enough to break her if she doesn't adapt (which isn't her strong suit). The villains she'll face scare me. So much so that I refuse to delve into one of them until I absolutely have to because it's the stuff of nightmares.

And guess what? The heroine for the series after that is already taking shape.

This is just one writer's way of learning her characters. Each writer has to find the method that works best for them. How you do it doesn't matter, but if you don't sink beneath your characters' skin, your reader won't either. Love your characters. Not the idea of the character that first graced your page, but the real, fleshed-out person--in all her beauty and flaws--and your reader will too. Hate your villain--don't hold him back from scaring you senseless--and your reader will too.

Happy writing.

More Than You Ever Wanted To Know

I got one of those email forwards today instructing me to change the answers to my own and then send it off to the rest of my mailing list. Instead, the lazy blogger in me decided this might be an entertaining blog entry.

1. What time did you get up this morning? 6:30, although my brain engaged sometime later in the morning.

2. Diamonds or pearls? Shoes! What? It's an accessory.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? 12 Rounds (A Big FAT Don't Bother!)

4. What is your favorite TV show? Lost is my favorite show currently on tv (and yes, I'm a rabid fan). Other all-time favorites include Alias and I Love Lucy.

5. What do you usually have for breakfast? Cereal, if I can protect my bowl from my diabolical kittens long enough to wolf it down.

6. What is your middle name? Queen Of Everything

7. What food do you dislike? Green beans, apples, and most forms of chocolate. Also pizza. And don't forget okra. Blech.

8. What is your favorite CD at moment? Red's Innocence And Instinct

9. What kind of car do you drive? A cherry red Ferrari. Oooohhh. You meant my non-imaginary vehicle. Fine. A Saturn Relay. It's a mini-van, but I drive it with a Ferrari attitude.

10. Favorite sandwich? Grilled turkey BLT with Swiss, no mayo. I hate mayo.

11. What characteristic do you despise? Cruelty, dishonesty, and self-centeredness. Also the ability to eat anything at all and still wear a size 2.

12. Favorite item of clothing? Shoes. And by shoes, I mean stilettos, boots, and wedge heels. No flats or flip-flops for me.

13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Ireland

14 . Favorite brand of clothing? I don't have one. I seriously do not care about brands. It's silly to pay three times as much for something just because someone's name is on the tag.

15. Where would you retire to? Transylvania. In my own castle. As Queen Of Everything.

16. What was your most recent memorable birthday? That's a weird question. Is it implying that only certain birthdays are memorable or wondering when's the last birthday I remember having? I'm not that old, yanno.

17. Favorite sport to watch? Football, boxing, basketball. Just not golf. That bores me senseless.


18. Furthest place you are sending this? Hm...well, I do have blog readers from Latvia. That's pretty far away.

19. Person you expect to send it back first? I'm going to change this question to the person I think will comment first. Can't be sure which of my regular commenters will hit my blog next, so I'll say either Kerry Allen or Wandereringray.

20. Your Birthday? January 8 (Go ahead and put it on your calendar. I'm very open to flattery and bribes of the bookstore gift card variety.)

21. Are you a morning person or a night person? Either. Whichever I have to be. I learned that this summer when I stayed up until 3 am writing some nights.

22. What is your shoe size? Whatever gets me into the pair I'm currently craving.

23. Pets? A big chow hound named Bear and two feline Divas of Deviousness named Carly and Tinks.

24. Any news you'd like to share with us? Um. *scratches head to think of something not already on the blog* I'll get back to you on this one.

25. What did you want to be when you were little? A writer, a teacher, and a superhero with magical powers.

26. How are you today? *rolls eyes* Dizzy, but let's not dwell on that.

27. What is your favorite candy? Hot Tamales, which are of the devil.

28. What is your favorite flower? I don't really like flowers. They give me headaches.

29. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to? The day we receive our little girl's picture from China. The day I sign a book deal. The day someone gives me a pair of those super cool Chanel pistol heels.

30. What's your full name? I often get asked what C.J. stands for. I say Calamity Jane. Judging from the content on this blog, I defy you to call me a liar.

31. What are you listening to right now? Tornado news coverage on the tv.

32. What was the last thing you ate? A crescent roll with cream cheese and salsa in the middle.

33. Do you wish on stars? Sometimes.

34. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Red.

35. How is the weather right now? Rain, thunder, lightning ... but the tornado warning is pretty much over for now.

36. The first person you spoke to on the phone today? My hubby. :)

37. Favorite soft drink? Diet Coke with Lime

38. Favorite restaurant? Asuka (hibachi grill) or Logans

39. Real hair color? Ha! With three boys, it's probably gray, but I don't let it go that far.

40. What was your favorite toy as a child? Books, my Wonder Woman underoos, and Strawberry Shortcake. Also toy horses, but that was before a horse rudely kicked me in the head. (*sigh* Yes, yes, another head injury...)

41. Summer or winter? I like both, but autumn is best.

42. Hugs or kisses? Both!

43. Chocolate or vanilla? Both are equally boring unless combined with something I really love. Like strawberries. Or peanut butter. Or coffee.

44. Coffee or tea? Coffee, though the caffeine does have some rather interesting side effects on my personality.

45. Do you want your friends to email you back? I'll change this to "Do you want your readers to comment?" and of course the answer is yes.

46. When was the last time you cried? Last week at the end of Sayid's Lost episode. Which is unusual, because I'm not a crier. Still, it was powerful enough that I got tears in my eyes. But the last time I really cried was February 9th, when my beloved Taz died.

47. What is under your bed? Dust bunnies. A box of cassette tapes (Wow! Do I even have a tape player anymore? I don't think so.) And whatever contraband Tinks has smuggled under there.

48. What did you do last night? I'd love to tell you, but my lawyer says keeping my mouth shut at this point is essential to my case.

49. What are you afraid of? Drowning, driving over bridges (directly relates to the whole drowning thing) and semi trucks. Also, mullets. And while fear isn't an accurate emotion for how I feel about goats, I do find them highly disturbing. Highly. Disturbing.

50. Salty or sweet? Sour and spicy.

51. How many keys on your key ring? 5, I think. I don't care enough about the answer to go check.

52. How many years at your current job? 4

53. Favorite day of the week? Any day I get to stay home from work and spend time with my family instead.

54. How many towns have you lived in? 8

55. Do you make friends easily? I think so, though it takes a while to move beyond the "friendly" stage and into true friendship.

I'll Shoot You In The Leg

1. I recently realized that I neglected to do two or three sentences from my earlier Get Me Started writing exercise.

2. Now, I'm trying to decide if I go ahead and do those three, or start the whole thing all over again.

3. I have to lock myself in my office each morning to eat breakfast while the kittens attack the door, trying to break it down and get to my cereal.

4. I've learned the hard way not to have sympathy for their pathetic meows.

5. The devious little beasts use cuteness to soften up their victims before moving in for the kill.

6. My head is slowly improving. The dr. told me to drink plenty of fluids which, while I'm sure is always a good idea, seems in this case to be code for "Nothing's going to cure this except time but I need to say something vaguely medical so there you go."

7. Besides, the more fluid I drink, the more trips to the commode I'm forced to make and is it really wise to send a dizzy klutz into a small room packed full of unyielding porcelain, marble, and wood?

8. Lost totally rocks this season.

9. Favorite dialogue exchange from last night's show: "Are we under house arrest?" "No, you're free to leave any time you want. But if you do, I'll shoot you in the leg."

10. Paul and I watched 12 Rounds yesterday (which is a colossal waste of time and I might post about it soon) with his gun sitting in the drink holder between us.

11. All those who would foolishly answer their cell phones in the middle of a movie have now been warned.

12. I went with my hubby to his favorite cake decorating supply store in Nashville and learned an interesting fact.

13. My hubby responds to that store the same way I respond to a bookstore (or a shoe store!): Instant fascination with everything and a complete inability to just pick up what he came in for and leave.

14. I had to practically drag him out so we wouldn't be late to the theater.

15. Speaking of browsing bookstores, I got into an interesting discussion on Twitter about preferring to buy my books from a brick and mortar store rather than Amazon or B & N online.

16. I understand many love the "If you bought this, you might also like this" feature, but I rarely go into a store with a specific book or author in mind. I like to wander through the aisles, pick up interesting covers, read samples and then try new stuff.

17. I go to Amazon and have no idea where to start and become quickly bored and frustrated.

18. Sooo, while I understand the adoration some have for online book shopping, I'm going to stick to my old school ways because it's most enjoyable for me.

19. Reader Question: Which do you prefer? Shopping for books online or in a brick and mortar store?